Youtube link to audiobook of Chapter 10 and the rest of the book!

Chapter 10

He that plants thorns must never expect to gather roses

English Proverb

From:

Subject:  Freakin’ Retaaaaaded

To:

I still don’t know why you think straying from your brother’s career path is “taking one hell of a chance.” It ain’t nuthin. Betting your whole fortune on a single roll of dice is “taking one hell of a chance,” hun. What you’re doing is “trying some new things.” No matter what happens, I hardly see you sucking a rock-pipe in the ghetto anytime soon. Don’t worry so much. Don’t think so much.

Did I mention that I haven’t had a beer in four days? I think I’m starting to experience beer withdrawal. Tomorrow will be a milestone, as I haven’t gone five days without a beer since I was about 14 years old.

As for Angela, I just want her to GO AWAY. I haven’t e-mailed her, I haven’t fielded her phone calls, and frankly every time the phone has rung or wrang or rang since Sunday night I have RUN to the caller ID box to see who it is because I DON’T want to talk to her. If you see her, tell her I moved to Ecuador with my longtime gay lover Sergio.

Rutherford

From:

Subject:  Re:

To:

LL/SF,

I want you to know that I’m thinking of sending Rutherford a fairly scathing e-mail, giving him a big piece of my mind. I think the guy is seriously and dangerously screwed up, and I need to tell him that. I need to ask you as a friend to please refuse to discuss this with him if he brings it up. Tell him it’s between him and me, and that you want nothing to do with it. But please, Lori, I am begging you.  Don’t ever bring his name up with me again, and don’t talk about me with him. I need you to promise me this. The only time I could tolerate hearing his name is if you decide to drop him from your life. He is poison to me, Lori, even the mention of his name. Believe it or not, he had a worse effect on me than other guys with whom I spent a much longer time. I think the reason for that is because he is so completely messed up that he has ceased to be human anymore. 

So here is the last thing he wrote to me:

“Angela, I know you mean well. I really do. Do I really “need help,” as you say? Well, probably, but I don’t WANT it. How about if we open a dialogue here about why I NEVER had any dates when I was “Mr. Nice Guy,” but now that I’ve got liquid nitrogen in my veins it seems like I can find women around every corner I cross, eh? Explain THAT!

Rutherford”

So Lori, here’s what I really want to send to that sick, demented son of a bitch. Tell me what you think:

One of my tragic flaws involves not being able to keep my big mouth shut when I see and feel EVIL around me. And after reading this load of garbage from you, I can’t help but wonder if you haven’t literally gone over to “the dark side.” Rutherford, you are perhaps THE most screwed-up, delusional, and downright nasty person I have ever known. There should be prison sentences for the cruel crap you pull on people. First of all, you think that being a cold-ass jerk is getting you girls. YET … LOOK AT THE GIRLS YOU ARE GETTING, IDIOT. You’re getting the BOTTOM OF THE BLOODY BARREL, Rutherford. You represent everything I hate about your gender. You represent the worst of your gender. Yet you had the NERVE to once try to convince me that you were one of the “good guys” to whom I should give a chance. You make people like Nick Warren look like saints. 

One thing that struck me the first day I met you was that you TRY so hard to be “cool,” and that ALL you SUCCEED in doing is coming across like a pathetic jerk TRYING to be cool. And not REALLY cool at all. You are a fraud. A phony. A sneak, thief, and liar. You play sick mind games with people, and think that makes you a wicked cool “bad boy” to whom girls are drawn. And then, after boasting about your newfound “bad boy attractiveness” you announce that you don’t WANT help!! That you don’t even want to talk about it anymore. Well, SCREW YOU, you unfathomable LOSER. Screw you for wasting MY precious time trying to help your sorry ass.

Angela

From:

Subject:  Re:

To:

I’d reconsider sending Rutherford that e-mail. Why don’t you wait until you’re a little calmer? You find him irksome, bottom line. You gave him (the “friendship”) a shot. I don’t think he (it) deserves anymore of your energy. I would just distance myself. 

Lori

From:

Subject:  Re:

To:

Too late. I sent it. I had to… You may hear from him after he’s read it. Please back me up, Lori, as best you can. I find him absolutely EVIL. I ended up sending him an “amended” letter, which was even worse. I am proud of what I did. Someone has to have balls enough to hit him between the eyes.

Angela 

From:

Subject:  Got this friend I think you should meet

To:

So THIS is the crap I’ve had to deal with:

“Rutherford,

You’ve decided many times over to become furiously defensive with me for trying to offer input on particular issues that I’m sure you recall. You have never even had the decency to learn more about my legitimate concerns, choosing instead to berate and insult me in your usual caustic manner. This, after I was just trying to be a good, honest friend who’d made some valuable observations that she felt needed to be shared. Rest assured that I’ve never wanted ANYTHING from you other than a very, VERY casual friendship, at best. I would never want to be close to anyone who made me feel as badly as I did with you. I’m the type of person who tries very hard, often too hard, to see the best in people. But you are so steeped in insecurities and denial that one must wonder if you are even a human being anymore. I intend to wash my hands clean of you (and anything to do with you) after sending this e-mail. I’ve already wasted FAR too much of my precious time on you. I needed to say my piece, and now I have said it. But I am no longer offering you the opportunity to respond (with whatever vile thoughts you’re having right now), because I am blocking you from my e-mail inbox. In closing, I am not saying you are a “bad” person, Rutherford. But I truly feel that you are in DIRE need of getting some MAJOR help for your LOSER ASS.

Angela”

From:

Subject:  Re:

To:

If Rutherford does bring anything regarding me up to you, you CERTAINLY have my permission (and in fact, I want you to say this) to tell him that my anger had been building up for a long time, and escalated when he ignored me. Tell him that I felt maligned and mistreated to the point where I just couldn’t hold it in any longer.

Angela

From:

Subject:  Fix-ups

To:  

Lori, Angela is SCREWED. She is a hateful, disoriented, immature weirdo. If you think that she was justified in ANY way in writing the things she wrote to me, then tell me now. And I promise you that I’ll be shocked, and offended.

Rutherford

From:

Subject:  Re:

To:

Rutherford,

What will it take for you and Angela to realize that I don’t appreciate being thrown into the center of all your madness? I think you guys really need to cool it for a while.

Lori

From:

Subject:  Weebles wobble

To:

Lori, you’re absolutely right, and I apologize for getting you in the middle of crap like this. You don’t deserve to have to put up with such bull. And oh yeah, you’re right. Angela and I should “cool” it for a while. Like for about 30 or 40 years, maybe. Sorry again for getting you in the middle of it.

Expediently, of course,

Rutherford

(stay tuned for chapter 11…)

Here is a link to a real-life illustration of a challenging relationship dynamic, entitled “Reeling.”

And here are some other interesting and pertinent links:

DeMars Coaching – YouTube (DeMars Coaching)

Surviving Narcissism – YouTube (Dr. Les Carter)

NARCDAILY- You Are Not Alone – YouTube (NARCDAILY- You Are Not Alone)

Lisa A. Romano Breakthrough Life Coach Inc – YouTube (Lisa A. Romano Breakthrough Life Coach Inc)

DoctorRamani – YouTube (DoctorRamani)

Dr. Todd Grande – YouTube (Dr. Todd Grande)

Crappy Childhood Fairy – YouTube (Anna Runkle- Crappy Childhood Fairy)

Donielle Jolie Yanez – YouTube (Donielle Jolie Yanez)