Link to the Youtube video and the rest of the series!

As her fans know, Siggie looks up to the Greats, the Terribles and even the Impalers of the past. She hopes to learn what it takes to someday make the history books herself! In Episode 5, Siggie discusses the founder and first Khan (king) of arguably the greatest empire in world history–the Mongol Empire. This is Genghis Khan, or Temujin (his birth name). Part 2 discusses some of the most famous–and brutal–conquests that he or his generals undertook, showing little mercy on their enemies. It is unclear how many of these stories are true, versus legend. Siggie then discusses the death of Genghis Khan, and his complicated, enduring legacy.

Yeah, so, here are just a few stories that I heard of about Genghis Khan. You know,

just to give you a little bit of an idea of what a what a sweetie pie he was.

Basically, he decimated 11% of the planet. Piles of skulls, chopped up bodies,

even impaled pets. Talk about “kiss the ring.” Even though he was basically

merciless, you know, when it came to his enemies, he was somewhat of a sweetheart

when it came to his own people, and religion, culture, and all that stuff. Yeah,

yeah. So, let’s just say that guys like Julius Caesar, even Atilla the Hun, look like

neutered choir boys in comparison to this person. So, let’s start with Termez in

southern Uzbekistan, in 1220. Summertime. These guys in this place, Termez, they

foolishly thought that they could defend themselves against Genghis. Oh yeah, they

actually succeeded for a couple of days, but then they were conquered. And when I

say “conquered” I mean freaking CONQUERED. Genghis told his soldiers, “Round up every

man here, but no, no, no, no. Don’t stop there. Don’t stop there. Grab the women,

grab the children, so that I can go  down in history as, you know, like the

most brutal conqueror that ever existed… so I can win this contest.” All these

people were sent to an open field and they were slaughtered. There was one

woman and she was saying, “Please spare me… I swallowed a large pearl! I’ll give it to

you!” I don’t know how she was expecting to give it to them? [like a bowel

movement?] Yeah, like a bowel movement. Yeah, but whatever… whatever she had on her

mind, I’m not sure. But you know they they ended up disemboweling her. Not exactly

what she wanted… And they found yeah, there was a pearl, and they’re like, “Hey you

know what? Maybe there are more!” They disemboweled everyone in search of pearls. So

that’s one story.

Then there was the Battle of the Kalka River in the Ukrainian

region of Donetsk Oblast. It was basically the Mongols against the Rus’. Originally,

they were Norsemen from what is now Russia, Ukraine and Belarus. They

basically chased the Mongols away. There was a big battle here led by two

generals under Genghis, you know. So, they did you know chased the Mongols away and

then the Mongols retreated but it was part of the Mongol strategy to spread

out their armies. Rus’ outnumbered the Mongols, but the Mongols were better

soldiers, they had better skills, they were quicker and guess what? They had

spies. This is the Genghis Khan version of James Bond. The Mongols ended up

defeating them, you know, because of all these superior traits that they had.

The Mongols had a rule about being somewhat civil. Oh no, no… there would be

no bloodshed of nobles. So, here’s how they got around this rule. They were able

to be savage but in a very passive aggressive Genghis Khan Mongol kind of way.

There was a big scaffold made with wood… The nobles were propping up the wood. The

Mongols ate, they drank, they partied on the scaffold and they ended up 

crushing the nobles, flattening them like pancakes. Yeah, okay now let’s go to 1219

in Otrar, which is part of a huge Empire led by Governor Inalchuq. He

murdered a bunch of Mongols thinking that they were spies. Remember the

James Bond thing? They were really just there to trade some goods. I think they

had fabric or they wanted to trade maybe gold or something in in an exchange?

Whatever. [And also they might have been spies].  Yeah. That might have been. We don’t know, you

know, none of us were like alive then. In response  to this Inalchuq guy… there were some

beheadings, slaughtering of men. Again, let’s not just stop with the men. Let’s

also slaughter the women and the children. Inalchuq’s fate was to be

captured alive. Genghis wanted him alive. Why? So that he could pour molten silver

into his mouth, his eyes and his ears. Reminiscent of Crassus, who had molten gold

pulled down his throat by the Persians. The Siege of Urgench, where 1.2

million people were executed. It is considered one of the bloodiest

massacres in the history of the world. The massacre at Merv and Nishapur… Most or all

people in these places were killed during these battles. In one instance,

there was a stacking of severed heads into like these pyramids. 10 to 15

million people were slaughtered and these massacres and there was a sacking

of Kiev. You know, the whole place was burned to the ground. I think out of

50,000 people there were like 2,000 that were spared. I mean it was just total

mayhem. It just kept going on and there was just no stopping these guys. Then we

go to China, where the Mongols set up camps, you know, and they had their food and

they had their water and they even sucked the blood out of horses’ necks. It’s

funny, though, with all this barbarism, and, you know, the catapulting of heads

and then chopping people up and not caring if it’s women and children and

just murdering every single person in a conquered city… you know, leaving no

survivors… not sparing a soul. They still had this thing about no bloodshed for

nobles. They like, they took this one guy, you know, and no, no, no, not, not, not

going to cause bloodshed. I don’t know, they rolled him up in like a carpet or

something, and they had him trampled to death. They were creative. It’s not a

philosophy to cause bloodshed, you know, amongst nobles. So, we’ll figure out

creative ways to squash the crap out of them and cause these slow,

agonizing deaths just to uphold our virtues and our standards.

So how did all of this massacre and

craziness end? Genghis reputedly fell from his horse while hunting in the winter of

1226 to 1227. He became increasingly ill after this. His illness was believed to

be malaria, maybe typhus or perhaps the bubonic plague. Lots of guesses about his

death, including he was shot by an arrow during a siege or struck by lightning. In

1227, he died while suppressing rebellion in Western Xia, one of his first

conquests. His third son, Ogedei, would take the throne 2 years later.

Genghis’s grandson was Kublai Khan. This was the founder and first emperor of the Yuan

dynasty of China, which was led by the Mongols. The Mongol Empire would last

well until the 15th century, though by then it had been much reduced in size.

Genghis left a complicated legacy. On the one hand, his conquests were ruthless and

brutal, which you should know by now. But he began the creation of the Asian to

European trading system. He helped establish a legal system and a postal

system. He was tolerant of different cultures. He was actually named “Man of

the Millennium” and of course he shaped military tactics in history and general.